June 7, 2006
GUARDIANS

SUPERMAN
(v 1.0.1)

By Morley Evans



Dear Mr. Strakon,


T s you may have heard, our secret police (Gee, I didn't know we had a secret police in Canada) have foiled a terror plot. Canadians are now being protected by thugs in camouflage with sniper rifles who have been stationed atop tall buildings. I saw a picture of one last night on the front page of the Regina Leader-Post. Lloyd Robertson, the long standing news anchor on CTV, is warning Canadians about all manner of terrorist threats that are lurking under every bed. We are threatened, he says! Canadians are lapping it up, apparently. (Still, a large and growing number of Canadians are very unhappy about Canada joining the coalition of nations that are willing to be bullied and bribed.) On The National last night, Mr. Steven Harper, our Prime Minister, bravely dismissed the dangers he and his security establishment have conjured. (I didn't know we had a security establishment in Canada. From where have these people come? They are popping up like mushrooms.) Imagine! The terrorists planned to storm the capital, capture the Prime Minister, and chop off his head. Wow! (Of course the people who were arrested don't have any idea what our guardians are talking about. A likely story, I'm sure.) You may not know this, Mr. Strakon, but Superman Comics were dreamed up by two Canadian lads in Toronto. Yes indeed. Canadians have vivid imaginations that take a back seat to no one. Our fiction writers can fear monger with the best. Canadians are lucky to have Steven Harper. He is beginning to resemble Superman more and more each day. Harper, like U.S. Marshal George W. Bush, protects us from evil doers. Felons from Krypton, beware! Turn up the hockey game.


- Morley Evans


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